


So Sweet, with a Mean Streak

by Thatbookishgirl



Series: GenderSwap Universe [1]
Category: Captain America - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Winter Soldier (Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bucky is a girl, Cunnilingus, Domestic Avengers, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff, Genderswap, Jealousy, Kissing, Light Angst, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Mutual Pining, Not Beta Read, Not Canon Compliant, Pepper is a guy, Romantic Fluff, Sex, Steve Deserves Nice Things, Steve Rogers Feels, Vaginal Fingering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-30
Updated: 2018-08-03
Packaged: 2019-04-30 01:42:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 15,965
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14486061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thatbookishgirl/pseuds/Thatbookishgirl
Summary: When the Avengers finally capture the Winter Soldier, everyone, Steve most of all, is surprised to see that his best friend never died. She was alive, beautiful, and deadly. Now he just had to figure out how help her catch her barrings and topple HYDRA for all it has done.I suck at summaries.Genderswapped characters - Bucky, Pepper, and Loki (he can switch genders whenever he wants but is almost always a girl in this)





	1. Chapter 1

Steve had been trying to dodge every shot the Winter Soldier was firing at him. No one thought she would be here, the intel gave no indication that HYDRA would bring out their most dangerous asset for what appeared to be a small-time venture. Natasha kept barking off instructions and guiding Clint, but Steve was distracted. The soldier, a woman and a huge surprise to him, was standing impressively in a field of fire. Smoke was billowing up towards the sky with rubble scattering the ground. He watched the Soldier’s cat-like motions as she made her way closer to him. They had heard a lot about the soldier, but no one had ever mentioned a gender. He had always assumed the soldier was a man, which he now felt a little shame about now. Her hair was whipping wildly around her face and those steely eyes were practically boring into him. She kept taking steps in his direction. Steve knew that he was her ultimate target. She was supposed to kill Captain America in the name of HYDRA so the Avengers would crumble and they could succeed world domination. He couldn’t believe that he was still fighting these people even after 70 years. He couldn’t believe Nazis were still operating during these modern times and he often, jokingly, commented that he should re-freeze himself for another 70 years and see if the trend continued.

“She doesn’t look remotely friendly,” Sam quipped as he he swooped down near Steve and Natasha ran to his side. They stared and braced themselves, all knowing that HYDRA always had a bag f tricks and the Soldier would be unpredictable, even for Natasha,

“She’s not. At least, not anymore,” Widow grumbled and steadied her gun. It was then that a loud explosion rang out and every briefly fell to their knees, the soldier included. It was then that her mask fell, bright, red lips now glowing like a beacon in the smoke and dust. Steve gasped and forced himself to stay upright. He knew every inch of that face - he had studied it for years, it was firmly imprinted in his memory. Her face hung on the wall in his room.

“Jamie?” he gaped.

“Who the hell is Jamie?” she shot back and leveled her gun at him. Before she could even fire a shot something hit her neck. Her eyes got wide and she faltered before her eyes dropped closed and she fell to the ground. Her body looked lifeless and Steve panicked.

“Holy shit,” Tony exclaimed. Steve ran to where she fell as Clint and Sam took out various HYDRA agents as they descended upon the scene. Thor soon made an appearance and knocked them all down with a swing of his hammer, bodies scattering the ground around them. Steve scooped Jamie into his arms, he forgot how small she really was - they were nearly the same size back in the 30s before he met Dr. Erskine.

“How in the hell is your pal still up and kicking?!” Tony landed next to them. He recognized the face too, all the pictures his dad had kept included her several times.

“HYDRA,” Natasha answered for him and gave Steve a sharp look, “We should take her back to the tower. Keep her sedated and under our watch. They will come looking for her. She is their most valuable asset.”

“Tash...she’s…” Steve didn’t know what to say. Not now. He had no words in the moment. He simply let Tony bind her arms and afix more binds to her knees and ankles. Steve never let go, keeping her tight to his chest the entire ride back to the tower. Even when they removed have her armor and every weapon as they strapped her to the gurney. She looked as far from dangerous as anyone could be and Steve could not believe a second of what was happening.

She looked beautiful lying there. Probably more beautiful than she had any right to, her lip still painted a deep red despite the mask they had her wear. He wondered if that was a choice she made or if someone made it for her. He knew the horror stories about HYDRA and how they treated their soldiers, Natasha told him as much. He figured that her and Natasha’s stories were very similar, but Jamie never got away. Jamie was stuck there...years of hell and he couldn’t bear to picture it. 

“She might not remember you,” Natasha started, brushing Jamie’s hair back from where it fell in her face. She was gentle in her movements, likely remembering her from when she was younger and in deep within HYDRA’s clutches. They were both young once, both soft and unmarred by combat. Natasha might have gotten glimpses before everything went to hell.

“That’s fine with me as long as she is safe. I - I can’t believe….I thought she died. This is...this is worse,” he looked down at her prone form. She still had that dark chocolate hair and pale skin, striking cheekbones and strong jaw. There were few differences between then and now, the only glaring one being her arm. It was sleek metal connecting to marred flesh at her shoulder. He winced as his eyes traced along the jagged scars and angry flesh, it was irritated and her skin dry. 

“She doesn’t look half as scary like this,” Tony announced as he waltzed into the med bay with a clipboard in his hand.

“You’d be a fool for thinking she was any less dangerous,” Natasha gave.

“Au contraire,” he waggled his eyebrows, “She is being held down with stuff strong enough to hold Steve. She isn’t going anywhere.” Steve didn’t like that, but he understood why the precautions were being taken. Hell, he was still surprised Tony let her even come into the tower, all things considered.

“What happens now?” Steve sighed.

“Wait for the sedative to wear off and see where her noggin is at,” Tony started, “You know. When you always talked about her this is not what I was expecting.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, you said she was always dragging you out of fights. I thought she’d be, ya know, bigger than you or something. Maybe a little more butch,” Tony shrugged.

“No. She just has a mouth on her. Sent most guys runnin’. Besides, they weren’t gonna hit her or anything,” Steve answered. He remembered her threatening to deck a guy once. He laughed at the thought and stopped laughing once he was hit over the head with her umbrella.

“And you said she was always helping you with rent. What sort of job could she get that help you with that? Girls couldn’t exactly get great jobs from what my dad said,” the scientist recalled. Which was somewhat true, but likely exaggerated greatly on Howard’s end.

“She lived with her folks, so it's not like she had to worry about rent. She worked a few jobs, she was a waitress once, worked in a floral shop, worked in a speakeasy another time. When times were really tough and I had medication I needed and couldn’t...she might have gotten a few guys to pay for dinners and stuff to save money. She knew how to sweet talk ‘em,” Steve recalled with a smile. He remembered at least once where she somehow managed to get this lawyer to buy dinner for her and Steve in the dead of winter. He is still not sure how she swung it exactly. He is sure a lot of pity was involved. 

“That paints a picture,” Tony whistled, “Never knew she was the type of gal to put out in order to -”

Steve had Tony up against the wall before he could even finish implying what he began. Jamie was a lot of things, but she never sold herself for anything. She flirted and she danced, but she was her own person at the end of the day and she wasn’t going to sell herself for anyone, even Steve.

“You say another god damn word and I will put you through this fucking wall,” Steve growled, “She was a saint and never dirtied herself for any of the cads that gave her the time of day.”

“Noted,” Tony wheezed. He had let Tony drop to the floor before turning back to Jamie. Bruce had entered the room and figured Tony had said something stupid in order to make Steve that mad.

“So, she will probably be waking up soon. The fewer people in the room is probably better,” he surmised. 

“I’m not leaving,” Steve said firmly.

“I figured as much,” Natasha snickered. Sam just rolled his eyes and moved to exit. Tony made a quick retreat while Bruce and Natasha hovered by the door. Steve watched Jamie take shallow breaths and wished that she would open her eyes and recognize him.

“She will be ok eventually. I was. You will need to give her time. A lot of it,” Natasha soothed.

“We don’t know the extent to what they did to her. What she endured for all that brainwashing to stick,” Bruce offered, “We can help her, Steve.”

“I know,” Steve bent his head as he sank to the chair. Jamie was sleeping. She looked the same as he had remembered. He had this picture of her that Pepper had tracked down for him. She was dressed up for something, though he could no longer remember what. Someone had captured the photo right as she turned to smile. He had it framed and put on his wall. He walked by it every morning.

It was hard for him to picture her doing all the things he had seen Natasha do. Harder to imagine what she went through to become that well-trained. He was sure she pushed back constantly, she certainly did when she worked under generals on the Enigma project in England. Most of her letters involved complaining about superiors and their attitudes;

" _ If one more person calls me little lady I might lose it, Stevie!" _ He recalled her writing one time. She knew how to turn on the charm when it suited her, but when it involved questioning her intelligence in some way - she hard a sharp tongue and sharper wit. She was always smarter than she let on, said it gave her the upper hand, which was true. When she had initially signed up to go overseas and work on the project Steve was concerned. He never thought she would ever get captured, but he was afraid she might never come back for all together different reasons. When her compound was invaded by HYDRA there was no force in the world that would stop him from getting her back.

When he rescued her after capture the first time she wore this strong mask of bravado. She walked alongside Steve, wrapped in his coat in the blistering cold, and the soldiers stepped out of her way without issue. She looked at him questioningly the entire time, even when he finally had her alone in his private quarters. He remembered her lower lip quivering as she sat on the edge of his bed;

_ “I thought I told you not to do anything stupid,” she managed, “But now you’re as big as a house and infiltrating evil, Nazi compounds.” _

_ “I thought we agreed that you were taking all the stupid with you,” he chuckled and she rolled her eyes. She looked so much smaller now, she was - to him. He dwarfed her by over a foot and he was not sure how to navigate that development. He wanted to scoop her up again, but figure she wouldn’t really be on board for any more manhandling.  _

_ “You know, I bet I could make a fortune selling stories to the papers now. Tell them all about the time I found Captain America drunk on whiskey and asking to braid my hair,” her smile was so bright. _

_ “It will be the only drunken story about Captain America you’ll ever get to tell because I can’t even manage to get a buzz now with the serum and all,” he shrugged. _

_ “Oh my god. That is the worst thing I have ever heard,” she flung herself back on his bed with a gasp. She laughed at him for a bit before eventually passing out, his jacket still draped along her body. He never did take it back from her.  _

"I think she's waking up," Bruce interrupted Steve's train of thought. He whipped his head over to see her eyes flutter open, that steely blue almost glowing in the dimly lit room. She started to lift her arms and realized she couldn't. Her heart rate suddenly skyrocketed and she nearly growled at the situation she was in. Her eyes darted around the room and she flinched when she saw Natasha. Bruce held up his hands defensively while Steve tentatively placed his hand on her forearm. She turned to him sharply and her features, briefly, softened. She began to struggle again.

"Jamie, calm down. We won't hurt you," he tempted.

" Eto bezopasno. Zdes' vy v bezopasnosti. ( _ It's safe. You are safe here _ )," Natasha began.

" Nebezopasno ryadom s vami, vdova. ( _ Not safe near you, Widow _ )," she shot back.

“ Bezopasnyy so mnoy i Stivom, chem kto-libo yeshche vo vsem chertovom mire ( _ Safer with me and Steve than anyone else in the whole god damn world _ ),” she informed, “ HYDRA ne mozhet nayti vas zdes' ( _ HYDRA cannot find you here _ ).”

“Jamie,” Steve whispered and watched her look back to him, studying his face. Recognition seemed to come in waves, one second she seemed relieved while she appeared confused in the next.

“I think I dreamt of you,” she said as she narrowed her eyes.

“A long as the dreams were good,” he let out a shaky breath. 

“Better than being awake,” she replied as the life in her face fell, eyes losing focus as her body tensed once more. 

“ Kotik. Prosto ostavaysya s nami. My mozhem pomoch' ( _ Kitten. Just stay with us. We can help _ ),” Natasha stepped forward. She ran her fingers through Jamie’s hair again and planted a soft kiss on her forehead. Jamie seemed to melt at that touch and her shoulders relaxed, “ Eto doktor Bryus Banner. On tozhe drug. On pomozhet nam ( _ This is Dr. Bruce Banner. He’s a friend too. He is going to help us. _ )”

“No doctors,” Jamie warned.

“Not that kind of doctor,” Bruce started, “I’m not a medical doctor at all. I promise.”

“He’s good,” Natasha ruffled Bruce’s hair and he blushed, “The only other person safer than him is Steve.”

“I’d be offended if it wasn’t true,” Banner agreed. He had a chart in his hands and examined it a bit before glancing back up at her, “I don’t know the extent of what HYDRA has done to you. I only know that you have healing capabilities that almost rival Steve with the same agility as Natasha. I venture to say that your body will fix itself no matter what help we try to give. The only glaring issues I am seeing are extensive muscle rigidity and malnutrition.”

“I do not eat food. Not really. HYDRA provides packs. I eat those,” she replied.

“From now on you’re getting nutrient-dense meals. You need it. We can move you to a better room, too. Get you a physical trainer and - “

“Stop,” Natasha put her hand on his arm, “You’re going to overwhelm her. You're also telling her what you are going to do instead of asking her. And she is still strapped to the bed.”

“Tony is the only one with the keys to release her,” Bruce tensed.

“JARVIS,” Steve spoke, “Send Tony back in here.”

“Steve, it might not be safe yet,” Bruce said quietly.

“It’s fine. She won’t hurt me,” Steve was firm. Soon, Tony was tentatively popping his head back in the room with another man. His reddish-blonde hair seemed to soothe Jamie somewhat as her body unwound when he approached, but she did tilt her head with some curiosity. 

“Hi. I’m Pepper,” he greeted, “My husband here says he is too much of a coward to try and uncuff you, so I agreed. He fought me on it but I always win our arguments.” Jamie listened and watched as his hands nimbly unstrapped his first leg. “He seems to think you’ll still be mad at him for knocking you out.”

“I’m not thrilled about it,” Jamie rolled her eyes and waited for her next leg to be free.

“I wouldn’t be either,” Pepper just laughed. Steve had placed his hands back on her arm and she leaned into the touch. She heard Steve gasp slightly as she pressed back against him.

“I figure Steve and Natasha can take you if worse comes to worst,” Pepper signed as he removed the last strap.

“Natalia has been lying to you if she led you to believe she can best me in a fight,” Jamie grinned.

“I’d challenge you on that, but now is not really the time,” Natasha smirked. Then Jamie started laughing. Really laughing. Both Steve and Natasha were shocked and overly pleased. She sat up, the light blue scrubs she was wearing hanging from her shoulders as she pushed her hair back. Steve’s face lit up as he watched her tuck her hair behind her ears and bite her lip, just like she did when they were in high school. Her face fell briefly when he looked out the window, but relaxed again as Steve took her hand in his.


	2. Chapter 2

A few things were decided that day, with the help of Natasha, Jamie agreed to remain with them and allow herself to be deprogrammed with the help of some very specific scientists. There was a Dr. Jane Foster and her lab assistant who were more than happy to help and neither of them seemed to put Jamie on edge. She would continue living in the medical bay until deemed ready to move into an apartment. Steve had insisted she stay in his spare room. Jamie hurriedly agreed. As her memories slowly creeped back, her picture of Steve was all the more clear. She still remembered him being smaller and he had to give her a run down of a few things. She accepted the information readily, but he knew that things would still need to come incrementally. They found a therapist through Sam and Natasha convinced her to do yoga with her and Bruce every other morning, she eventually developed a routine of yoga in the morning, reading or writing in her journals on the balcony, long shower, then eat a large,healthy meal. After that she usually wandered the tower or spent time with Natasha. Steve altered his entire schedule to accommodate her’s, he always wanted to be around. Just in case.

Steve ended up joining them as well because Steve had become Jamie’s shadow. Natasha had tried to convince him to give her space, but he wouldn’t budge on the issue and Jamie seemed to be more than content to always look back to see Steve hovering with a sketchbook in hand. After a month, Bruce, Jane, and Sam agreed that Jamie was ready to move in with Steve and settle into her new normal.

Steve noticed some things right away after Jamie took up residence in his spare room; if there was something soft in the apartment it always ended up in her room. Her bed was a nest of pillows and blankets that she easily buried herself into each night she did manage to sleep, more often than not she walked the perimeter of the apartment every hour and dozed. She always carried weapons too, at least one knife and one gun, at all times. She pulled the knife on Thor once when he arrived unannounced. She didn't hurt him, but she did spiral into a panic and it took Steve awhile to bring her back down. Even with those hiccups, he was estaticed she was here.

It was a quiet friday morning when he woke up and found her stretching in the living room. She was dressed in black spandex and her hair pulled back from her face. The sun was filtering through and falling across her in bright lines. She was glowing and Steve was entirely captivated. It didn’t matter that the sun reflected harshly off her metal arm or that he could see the outline of a knife strapped to her thigh. She wore a flesh-colored sleeve most days, but she took it off on lazier mornings.  

“Didn’t anyone ever tell you it was rude to stare?” she snorted.

“I think that person was you,” Steve laughed and brought her over a cup of coffee. 

“Clearly my lesson didn’t stick,” she arched her back like a cat and rose from the floor, reaching out for the coffee cup.

“How’d you sleep?” Steve asked.

“I was...restless. Only 3 nightmares, though,” She hummed as she sipped her coffee, “I slashed another pillow.”

“I think Tony can afford to buy some replacements,” Steve added, “Go for a run with me?”

“You ask me every morning,” she cocked her head, “Have I ever said yes?”

“No. But I’ll keep asking anyway. You could get out more. You haven't left the tower since you got here,” he observed.

“Can’t go risking the innocent public. I could snap any second and take out a coffee shop full of people or destroy the crowd waiting at a bus stop,” she sassed and downed her cup, depositing it in the empty sink.

“That won’t happen. You - “

“It could happen, Steve!” she flailed, “I’m not safe. The only people who can handle being around me are you or Natalia. Maybe that Thor guy.”

“Wait until you meet Loki and Valkyrie. They could take all of us single-handedly,” Steve scoffed.

“Not entirely reassuring,” she sighed and rolled her neck, “You could do yoga with me instead. It’s supposed to help me be more mindful and calm. It’s only make me more flexible.” Steve fought a blush as he watched her stretch her leg over her head. He pushed back against those thoughts more and more lately. Especially when he was lucky enough to catch her all sleepy in the living room. Sometimes she would curl up on the couch and watch movies and fall asleep. He found her there sometimes and wanted to join her, like he might’ve when they were younger. Before puberty they always slept in the same bed and were in each other’s space. But Jamie’s mom put a stop to that once they reached their teenage years, even if Steve was the furthest thing from being a threat to Jamie’s virginity. He knew he was no one’s first choice, or even last choice. Since she was back, they still hadn’t touched beyond a hand on a shoulder here and there. She didn’t let anyone touch her, even Natasha barely got close. He knew she had to be touch-starved, he often was. Natasha and Clint indulged him from time to time, but it was never quite enough.

“Not sure I am exactly the yoga type,” Steve smiled. 

“Neither am I. Please,” she pouted, pushing out her lower lip. Steve was a weak man because he agreed immediately and cancelled on Sam. They sat in the living room and went through each move together, laughing when Steve might stumble. Jamie had more precision than he did, which had always been true. She moved with fluidity that he had seen Natasha employ as well. By the time they had rotated through the entire sequence Jamie looked very centered, until she turned and her neck popped harshly. She winced and took a deep breath.

“Seems like the yoga isn’t quite tacklin’ that tension in your neck,” Steve observed.

“My entire body is muscle tension,” she sighed and leaned against the coffee table.

“Do you remember the winter's where I got really sick? Always coughing and my back hurt?” Steve started.

“Sort of…” she trailed off, “I remember making you breath in steam over the stove.”

“That happened a lot,” he smiled, “But the coughing always made my back tighten up and I had all these knots. You used to work out the really bad ones for me.” She listened and had this far off look in her eyes, he could tell she was trying hard to remember this. She probably didn’t have that written in her notebooks yet - the pages littered with memories out of order and without context. Some she came to Steve with, others were on pages she later took a black marker to. It was a long process.

“We used vaseline so I didn’t hurt your skin,” she said, almost like it was a question.

“Yes!” Steve beamed, “You were very gentle and afraid of bruising me.” Her face blushed for a second and he wasn’t sure why, “Maybe you should let me do the same for you.”

“You don’t need to - “

“I might not need to,” he interrupted, “But I’d like to. I can grab some oil and at least work out your shoulders.” He looked so hopeful and she couldn’t really say no to him. She barely could when they were younger. 

“Fine. But I am eventually going to ask you why you have oil in your bedroom,” she laughed and Steve just shook his head as he walked away to grab it. He had to calm himself. He was going to be touching her and he wanted to make sure she was comfortable. He didn’t want to hurt her. He was more likely to bruise her than the other way around these days. He knew that HYDRA had removed any idea of autonomy, emotional and physical from her. Natasha had given him enough details to know that Jamie had been through decades of torture. Her confiscating every soft thing that made its way into the apartment made perfect sense. When he re-entered the living room she was still sitting on the floor by the couch, back somehow tighter than it was when he left. He sat behind her and guided her back, his knees on either side of her body. 

“Just try and relax. I promise it’ll feel good. And if you want me to stop you can hit me or somethin’,” he reassured her. She smiled up at him before looking back at the floor. She felt his fingers, slick and warm, start moving gingerly down the back of her neck, starting at her hairline. She took deep breaths and let his fingers dance down her skin. She didn’t flinch like she would with most people. It felt right, him touching her. Like he was the only one who ever should. As he kept working her flesh, pressing harder against all her knots, all the thoughts of every touch she never wanted disappeared. The world narrowed to a point and that point was Steve’s hands providing gentle pressure and grounding her in the room. Even when he reached the metal he was gentle and caring. That area always hurt where the arm pulled harshly at her muscles and skin, the skin taught and dry. She had begun properly moisturizing again, but nothing really helped. She moaned when he pressed on a particularly sensitive spot and he paused.

“Is that ok?” he tested.

“Yea,” she mumbled, “Feels nice, Stevie.”

“Ok, good,” he hummed and kept working. Her skin was as soft as he remembered the last time he really touched her back in Germany, when she was trembling in his arms. He pushed down the straps of her tank top to get better access and she let him. He watched the fabric fall and moved closer. Her eyelids began to droop and she leaned against one of his legs and he heard her breathing even out. He worked lower, hands tracing her shoulder blades and working between them gently, Each muscle seemed to slowly loosen under his fingers. He looked down and watched each steady breath, her chest rising and falling. After a few more minutes he realized she had fallen asleep. She looked smaller than he had ever seen as she softly snored against his knee. He picked her up and carried her to her bedroom. He had to bite back a laugh when he realized she had 12 pillows and 9 blankets that he had to maneuver in order to get her settled. She folded easily into the pile of fabric. He watched her nearly melt and smile as he pulled the blanket over her shoulders. He dreamt about following her into bed sometimes. He imagined his body wrapping around hers and shutting out everything else. It was selfish and he knew it. Those long forgotten desires were coming back with a fury and he needed to stamp them down for her sake. Before retreating he risked kissing her on the cheek.

He was washing his hands when JARVIS informed him that Sharon was at the door. He let her in and braced himself for an onslaught of questions. She had been on an undercover operation for the past 6 weeks and wasn’t around for Jamie’s abrupt arrival, but he was sure that she was briefed once she arrived back.

“Hey there, soldier,” she smiled, “I hear you got a new roomie.”

“Yea. Hi,” he greeted, “The Winter Soldier is my new roommate.”

“Natasha told me. And Sam,” she smirked, “I’m glad, by the way, that you found her. Aunt Peg said she was one of the bravest people she ever knew.” She was. Her and Peg got on like fire when they first met, both relishing in female companionship in a sea of men. He remembered when Peggy and Jamie would drink whiskey at the bar and invite Steve to sit with them. He felt included and wanted, fet like he was apart of something bigger than the entire war altogether. 

“She still is. Dealing with all of this isn’t easy,” Steve replied.

“She around? Can I meet her?” Sharon asked.

“She’s takin’ a nap right now, but we can probably arrange something later,” Steve suggested.

“Natasha said she’s settling in ok. I imagine it’s been hard for her, both of you, really,” Sharon hummed, “I remember Natasha explaining a bit of the process she went through, and she didn’t have someone like you.”

“Well, she was always there for me. No matter what. I’m with her until the end of the line. I even took a backseat to missions. I don’t want to be gone if she needs me,” he explained.

“Which is sweet of you, but she will probably be fine. You need to give her some space eventually,” she folded her arms over her chest.

“Maybe. But it doesn’t feel right yet. I think we both need more time before I can shift back into my regular routine,” he grabbed a bottle of water form the fridge and found a knife taped to the inside.

“See, I’ve been storing my knives in the crisper, but that’s a good spot too,” she giggled.

“Easier access if someone breaks in,” Steve shrugged. He had become accustomed to finding weapons in all sorts of places. He found a gun in his shower the other day. He wasn’t going to question her actions, he was a bit tickled by it, if he was honest. She never put weapons in his bedroom, though. He wasn’t entirely clear as to why.

“We can make it a fun scavenger hunt when she eventually moves out,” Sharon observed. Steve paused at that, not having considered it would ever be an option. He pictured he and Jamie living together forever.

“Oh yea…” he furrowed his brow.

“Eventually you’ll try dating again and I can’t imagine girls being entirely comfortable with an ex-assassin across the hall. Especially one as pretty as I’ve been told. Way too intimidating,” Sharon joked. 

“I dunno. We’ve always been a package deal,” Steve deflected with a smile. 

“I guess you could find at least one girl who would be fine with that,” Sharon winked. Steve chuckled and Sharon looked off behind him. Jamie had peaked around the corner and Sharon caught sight of that dark hair, “Oh. Hi.” Steve spun around to see Jamie standing there with an apprehensive look on her face.

“You woke up,” he observed.

“Yea. Heard voices,” she stared.

“I’m Agent Sharon Carter. I’ve heard a lot about you,” she extended her hand and stepped closer to Jamie. She looked between the blonde woman and Steve before just stepping back. She seemed to be working something out in her head before nodding.

“I’m sure,” she pursed her lips.

“Stevie, isn’t always so great at communicating so I got most of it from Natasha,” she lifted her shoulders. 

“You wouldn’t be the first Carter he failed to mention a few things to,” she hummed and remained stationed.

“Sorry that we haven’t met until now. I was on an undercover operation and just returned,” she went on.

“Neat,” Jamie said and moved into the kitchen and got a bottle out of the fridge as well. She adjusted the placement of her knife and waltzed back to her room.

“Huh,” Steve bit his lip. There was some coldness in her words tat he hadn’t heard since they first brought her back. 

“I guess she’s still adjusting,” Sharon sighed, “Wanna come out for lunch?”

“I don’t want to leave her alone all day,” Steve argued.

“You could bring her. Or maybe introduce her to more people. She can’t only hang out with you and Natasha all the time,” she gave him an annoyed glance. 

“I know, but these things take time. She’s been through so much,” Steve deflated.

“Steve,” she frowned, “You can’t be a martyr about this.”

“It’s not martyrdom. It’s friendship,” he bit the inside of his cheek.

“I have an idea,” Sharon said  thoughtfully, “JARVIS, can you call Wade?”

“Wilson?!” Steve guffawed.

“Exactly,” she smiled. JARVIS replied that Wade was indeed in the tower. Sharon asked for him to come up to Steve’s apartment. He apparently yelled off something in reply about missing Peter’s stretching routine for the Captain and made his way upstairs. 

“Go get Jamie,” Sharon swatted at Steve’s arm, “I have a feeling that her and Wade might get along really well.” Steve did fetch Jamie and convinced her to meet someone else new, which he was afraid would be overwhelming. But she seemed to agree and reluctantly followed Steve back to the kitchen, with 2 more knives on her person. By the time Wade waltzed into the kitchen she was back to a ball of tension. Steve placed both hands on her shoulders again and felt her take a deep breath. She took a step back and pressed her back to his chest and unfurled again. Maybe he should initiate touch a bit more.

“Well. Hello, gorgeous,” Wade whistled. 

“Wade, this is Jamie. Jamie, Wade. He’s also known as Deadpool,” Sharon introduced.

“Peter isn’t into threesomes, but I’m sure I can convince him,” Wade grinned, all cat-like. Jamie widened her eyes and Steve coughed.

“Wade,” he warned.

“Dial it back. Got it,” Wade bounced.

“We thought you two might get along. You have a lot in common,” Sharon interjected.

“Do we?” Jamie cocked a brow.

“I think Sharon is dancing around the fact that we were both experiments and assassins. You at least look pretty after the fact,” Wade rambled off.

“Well, they needed me to be pretty,” Jamie snorted.

“See, perfect. They can hang out while we meet up with with Sam and Maria for lunch,” Sharon tugged at Steve’s sleeve. Jamie frowned for a second when she saw Sharon touching Steve, but she grounded herself and refocused. Steve had given up a lot for her. She would be able to manage time without him. She knew that she could, but she generally felt better when he was around. Wade was probably nice. Maybe she needed to meet more people and not be such a burden.

“It’ll be fine, Steve. I can spend time with this weirdo and you can have lunch with normal friends,” she smiled.

“You’re plenty normal,” Steve countered. But both she and Wade laughed at that.

“Just go, Stevie. I’ll see you tonight. We need to finish season 3 of Star Trek anyway. Take a break from me,” she shoved him towards the door. Steve left with Sharon, glancing over his shoulder at Jamie who seemed to be just as torn about this temporary separation.

 


	3. Chapter 3

Wade ended up being a quick friend for Jamie. He indulged her fascination with weapons and was feeding her pop culture exploration. Peter was more than happy to encourage his boyfriend making new friends while also helping Steve out. Wade had encouraged Jamie to begin training with himself and some of the other team members. She was slowly becoming more enmeshed with the others and proving herself as something more than the girl Steve was harboring. She also felt like she needed this to stop feeling so disconnected from herself. She was the asset for 70 years. Nameless. A machine. Her body hadn’t been her own for decades and now she was reclaiming it and exploring it as if it were a new terrain. Now she was slowly becoming Jamie again, but not quite the girl she was when Steve knew her. Sure, she carried around knives and knew how to use a sniper rifle better than anyone else and she had a metal appendage, but she also knew that she liked to smoke cigarettes and had a penchant for wearing dark lipstick and leaving lip stains on all the glasses. She liked science fiction and dancing, even tried to teach Steve a long time ago. And she liked Steve. She loved Steve. She always had, if her memories were anything to go by. Jamie could remember wishing Steve would ask her on a date when they were only 16, but he never did. She had grown to accept that she would never be the sort of girl Steve would want, especially now. She found herself thinking about his blue eyes while she was smoking on the rooftop and looking over the skyline which no longer resembled the one she barely remembered.

“Miss Barnes,” JARVIS’ voice echoed through the speaker, “The Captain is looking for you. Would you like me to inform him of your whereabouts?” JARVIS had somehow learned that she was seeking solitude when on the roof. So he asked each time she was up there if she wanted company. 

“You can send him up,” she sighed. The sun was setting and the sky looked golden. 

“Jamie,” she heard Steve call out from the door. When she turned she saw him bounding towards her like a happy puppy, eyes sparkling.

“Lookin’ for me, Stevie?” She smirked. He tilted his head and stared at her for a long moment and then suddenly started humming before laughing to himself.

“What?” she giggled.

“You just...you reminded me of this current song just now, the way you look. Reminded me of you when we were kids too,” he answered.

“Really? What song?” she cocked a brow. Steve blushed for a second and coughed before quietly singing;

_ “Funny how it seems like yesterday _

_ As I recall you were looking out of place _

_ Gathered up your things and slipped away _

_ No time at all I followed you into the hall _

_ Cigarette daydream _

_ You were only seventeen _

_ So sweet with a mean streak _

_ Nearly brought me to my knees” _

“I never had a mean streak,” she mumbled with a smile. 

“Really? Pretty sure I remember you making at least one guy in our math class cry,” he teased.

“To be fair, he was weak,” she pursed her lips. 

“I guess. You were never mean to me though,” he took a seat next to her. She offered him the cigarette and he took it. Taking a drag he watched her stare out over the city. She was slowly coming back to herself from what he could tell. She talked with more people and left their apartment regularly for things other than therapy. She got along well with Wade and Peter, she even had taken to semi-regular lunches with Pepper when the man wasn’t too busy. After some suggestions to Tony, the team decided they might see if Jamie was up for some Avengers operations. Steve wasn’t too keen on the idea, but he wanted to offer her something so she didn’t feel as lost. 

“So, Natasha was talking to me about something,” Steve began.

“Was she? I’m sure it was nothing but good things with how tense you are right now,” she laughed.

“She thought you might like to try some missions with us,” he said with a tight jaw.

“Really? They trust me enough to fight bad guys and carry a gun?” she took back the cigarette and held it to her lips.

“Yes. I mean, we all know you have the skills. And I thought you might like to take down some evil. Plus, you know you want to keep an eye on me anyhow,” he half-joked. She gave him a hard look as she thought about it. Picking up a gun to help Steve defeat evil was certainly better than all those times she used a gun to mow down, probably, innocent people. Maybe she could attone.

“Only under the condition that I pick my own outfit,” she teased and Steve just chuckled.

“Of course,” Steve took the cigarette back, holding it between his own lips longer while also tempted to just finish it off.

“I’ll need a new leather jacket,” she said in a sing-song voice and began to fiddle with her knife, “And a haircut.”

“Why?” Steve furrowed his brow and tugged on her ponytail.

“A lady likes to change her look every now and again. You aren’t the only one who gets to alter their appearance. I promise not to grow 3 feet and put on over a 100 lbs of muscle,” she rolled her eyes. Steve bit the inside of his cheek and put out the cigarette and followed Jamie to the door.

“At least people started looking at me then,” he countered. He moved to take another step forward but Jamie came to a stop. She spun around abruptly and stared up at his face.

“Anyone who ignored you before was a blind idiot,” she said firmly, “And there are a lot of idiots out there.” Steve looked at her steely eyes sparkling with determination.

“We certainly met a few,” he smiled before looking at the floor.

“Now, take me to figure out what my first mission is going to be. Then Pepper and Natasha can take me shopping,” she hopped. It was cute, Steve thought. Old mannerisms were happening more and more often and it pleased Steve to no end. Especially when she started biting on pens again, even Steve’s drawing pencils. 

By the time they made it down to the briefing room, Tony and Maria had several files laid out. The current operation was small-scale and the perfect size for Jamie to start off with. They needed a small strike team to break up some potential drug dealers that upgraded to arm’s dealing on the northern end of Red Hook. Maria broke down the order of events and how they would make their move in about 26 hours, which gave Steve enough time to prepare himself for seeing Jaime in a combat role. 

“Babygirl gets to come out and play?!” Wade bellowed.

“Yes, Wade,” Jamie rolled her eyes playfully. 

“You need some new digs, sweetheart,” he laughed and Steve frowned a bit.

“I was counting on Natasha or Pepper to help me in that area, actually,” She looked over to the redheads, both of whom nodded in agreement.

“Perfect. Girls trip for all. Can we get back to the details?” Tony groaned, uncharacteristically. He was still on edge about Jamie’s presence despite how much his husband and Steve had reassured him.

“Steve, Sam, Tony, and Natasha are going to do most of the work on the ground. Clint, Jaime, and Ward will be our eyes from this building,” Maria pointed to the tower near their target. Jamie went over the blueprints and looked over to Clint. He pointed at some area that she shrugged as a response to the unasked question. It was then that Agent Ward entered the room. Steve had seen him a few times and mostly just worked with him in passing. Knowing he would be working directly with Jamie made him a little worried.

  


“Agent Ward, This is Jamie Barnes. She will be working with you on this op. It’s her first,” Maria introduced.

“Wouldn’t be the first fledgling I took on,” he grinned.

“Not a fledgling, but thanks,” Jamie hummed. 

“She might be better with a rifle than I am,” Clint offered and Ward looked impressed.

“Well, then maybe I won’t be so annoyed this time around. The first time they gave me the Parker kid I wanted to throw him out  the window,” he revealed with a laugh.

“Hey,” Peter shouted, only to be shushed by Wade. 

“Anyway,” Ward continued, “We can meet early tomorrow to go over some details. There will be a few agents in the fray and you can meet them as well.” 

“How many?” Steve pressed.

“Small team of 5, including her,” Ward answered.

“5 is fine, Steve,” she reassured him and gently placed her hand on his forearm. 

“I’ll contact you tomorrow morning to go over everything. It should be quick for all of us,” he cocked his head and briskly left the room, but not before looking Jamie up and down.

“Right,” Natasha interrupted, “Pepper and I will steal her for a bit and bring her back. And don’t worry, Steve. We won’t be going further than down the street.”

“Call me if you need, ok?” he confirmed. Jamie just smiled and nodded.

 

Pepper and Natasha had taken her to a boutique where they had clearly called ahead and had it cleared out as there wasn’t a single other shopper in the mix. She mostly just bent to their fashion suggestions as so much had changed since she was able to select her own clothes. Yoga gear was easy, dresses and casual wear had become a different beast. She watched Natasha and Pepper fill their arms with soft colors when a display behind them caught her eye. There was a leather jacket and she was damn sure doing to get it. Natasha rolled her eyes and plucked that up as well. 

Pepper had been spot on with the color choices. She apparently looked breathtaking in pink as one male assistant had stated. He even helped her accessorize ‘appropriately’. By the end of the shopping portion she easily had an entire closet’s worth of clothing to her name now. But now it was time for a haircut and she was choosing that herself. She knew precisely what she wanted. She named a style and cut to the stylist who beamed at the choice before getting to work. Pepper simply sat across from her and poured her some tea.

“This isn’t too much for you today, is it?” he asked.

“No. It is a lot of change though. I haven’t been given choices like these in a long time. Franky, I didn’t have these choices before. We were dirt poor,” she gave.

“You’ll want for nothing now. You have your own back pay from the government, plus, Steve put you on all his accounts as well,” Pepper revealed.

“Really?” she sought.

“Oh yes. As soon as Steve had you back and knew you were staying he gave you access to everything,” Pepper continued.

“He didn’t have to do that,” Jamie frowned.

“You know he would move the world for you,” Natasha waltzed over, “He just wants to be sure you are taken care of. He says you always took care of him. I think this is a bt of him paying you back and trying to help you.”

“Just let him,” Pepper soothed, “It helps him too.”

“I guess,” Jamie bit her lip and just felt the Stylist cut her hair. She liked the feeling of gentle tugs on her scalp and the fingers carding through her long hair. It had been a long time.

“You know, I always wondered if you and Steve had been an item. He was awfully dodgy about it when I asked once,” Pepper smirked. Jamie just snorted and began to laugh.

“Definitely not. He never looked at me that way,” she sighed with a giggle. Natasha,, unimpressed, arched an eyebrow.

“Really? He told Tony…” Pepper trailed off.

“Told Tony what?” Jamie half-ordered.

“Well, he told Tony that you were his first kiss. I just assumed,” he said softly.

“So that wasn’t a dream,” Jamiee mumbled to herself. A dream, or a memory as it turns out, about Steve and her kissing at the train station had popped up more than once. She thought it was just a fantasy.

“So you have kissed?” Pepper grinned.

“Just once,” Jaime pursed her lips and starred off as the memory flooded her thoughts. 

_ She was shipping off that morning and Steve had scrambled to get to the train station in time. He was sure there would be a line of men wanting to see her off, her mother and sisters included, and he would be lucky to get more than a few moments, but he had to see her. Especially if it might be the last time. There were soldiers and others everywhere. He wasn’t sure where Jamie would be and the crowds he could barely even see over would make it hard to spot her. As he rounded a group of sobbing families he saw her standing there. Alone. Under a lamp. _

_ “Jamie!” he shouted. She looked up and beamed as he ran towards her, slightly out of breath. _

_ “You made it,” she said, relief washing over her. _

_ “Like I would miss you shipping out,” he teased. He noticed the lack of visitors. Even her family wasn’t there. _

_ “My mom couldn’t quite take watchin’ me get on the train. We said our goodbyes at home,” she sniffed.  _

_ “I’m still surprised your fan club isn’t here to see you off. Didn’t Chip say he would wait forever for you?” Steve noted. _

_ “I didn’t want anyone else here. You’re the only one who really matters, Stevie,” she breathed out. He was looking at her like she was an alien, not quite believing her words. He watched a blush creep across her cheeks as she bit the inside of her cheek. _

_ “Well, I’m glad I don’t have to share. Might not get to see you again,” he shrugged. _

_ “You know I’d come back. There is nothing in England for me. They certainly can’t make Coney Dogs good enough to keep me away,” she joked, “And you’re here.” _

_ “Come on, Jamie. You can’t have me followin’ you around forever,” he groused.  _

_ “Steve, I - “ _

_ The train whistle cut her off as it announced that people should start boarding. Families moved in on one another and final goodbyes were said. So many people were sobbing as they sent their loved ones off to war. Jamie looked at Steve’s sullen expression and made a very abrupt choice. Her arm shot out and grabbed Steve by the collar. She pulled him in and planted a firm kiss on his lips. His body froze as he seemed to be processing the feeling of her lips on his. They stopped for a second, both breathing heavily. She thought she had made a mistake before she felt his arm snake around her waist and pull her back in. He kissed so softly, but she was sure lipstick would be smeared on the both of them. The whistle called out once more and thy jumped back at the sound. Steve's eyes were dark and lips a messy smear of red. She was sure she look the same. She plucked a tissue from her pocket and blotted at her lips before walking towards the steps. _

_ “Be here when I get back, yea?” she swallowed. _

_ “Always,” he breathed out. She finished boarding and sat by the closest window seat. She watched him become smaller and smaller as they pulled away. _

 

When Jamie finished recalling this and sharing it with Pepper and Natasha, she looked up to see Pepper with a hand over his heart and glistening in his eyes. Even her stylist seemed enraptured. 

“That was one of the most beautiful and heart wrenching stories I have ever heard,” Pepper gasped.

“Girl, I just - that was beautiful,” her stylist managed.

“I didn’t think Steve would share that story,” Jamie murmured.

“Why didn’t anything happen when he found you in Germany?” Natasha asked.

“He had Peggy. And no one can turn down Peggy Carter. Or any Carter. Apparently,” she looked down at her lap and twisted her fingers. Realization dawned on Pepper and Natasha. Neither pressed the matter any further, instead refocusing on her current transformation. She didn't want to think about Steve then and Pepper seemed to recognize that. The heartbreak, though 70 years old, still felt fresh. 

 

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

 

Steve had been training with Sam for most of the afternoon when JARVIS informed him that Jamie had returned and was smoking on the roof. She had not worn her hair down since getting to the  tower; it was primarily pulled back or twisted into a knot. Now it fell down to her shoulders and whipped about her neck in the wind. When Steve made it up there he took pause as he found her leaning against the southern wall with a cigarette between her lips.

  


“Wow,” Steve smiled, “You took to the times like a fish to water. I’d believe you were truly modern.”

“Well, I had help,” she took a long drag and gave Steve a heavy stare. 

“So did I. I think Tony made it his mission to make me look less like an old man. Apparently, I wasn’t allowed to wear cardigans unless I really wanted to lean into my age,” he smirked.

“It feels nice. I feel a bit more like me. The sleeve helps,” she pointed to her human-looking arm, “I remembered picking out lipstick with you. I would pocket them sometimes.”

“Yea,” he reflected, “You always picked shades that were too orange for your skin tone.”

“Good thing I had you around,” she gave with a slight smirk.

“I’m nervous about tomorrow,” Steve announced as he plucked the cigarette from her fingers.

“I suppose I might be too. I don’t do well taking orders from anyone but you. HYDRA only wiped me because I fought back so much. Hopefully Ward can handle some sass,” she breathed out. The sun was setting around them and Steve couldn’t really stop looking at her. Her skin almost glowed at this time of day. Her face was fresh and open. She looked so much younger than she had in weeks.


	4. Chapter 4

Everyone was getting ready to roll out for the mission. Steve had to be ushered away by Natasha so Ward could get settled with Jamie and the others. She would be on a nearby rooftop with a mounted sniper rifle, Ward on her 6 with another at the adjacent building. He watched Jamie stand to the side with a gun in her hand and shrouded in black clothing. He hated it. He hated seeing her weaponized again despite how much she said it was something she wanted. What he hated more was how Ward maneuvered around her, his hand somehow affixed to the small of her back. Of course, what he hated the most was that she never flinched. He did enjoy her posturing with her new outfit and gun. She seemed more relaxed with having chosen these items and she always kept her skin-like sleeve over the metal arm. 

By the time they were leaving Steve had realized he didn’t listen to a single word of the briefing and had to fill himself in on the drive. He was thankful for the headset to talk with Jamie since they were in separate vehicles. 

“Don’t worry about me, Stevie. I’m better with a gun than any of these mooks,” he heard her snort in his earpiece.

“Just go easy on ‘em,” Steve relaxed and looked up to Sharon and Natasha. 

“She’s in fine hands, Rogers. Just do what you gotta do so we don’t have to do anything,” Ward cut in.

“Shove it, Ward,” Clint snarked, “You wish Nick or Coulson let you near the action.”

“Can we not argue, please?” Sharon groaned.

“Anyway,” Natasha snipped, “Can we refocus on our points of entry?”

“I already know that I’m heading in the east entrance that runs along the river. Tony is landing on the roof and Peter is going in with you. Sharon is going in through the front doors, for some reason,” Steve noted.

“Because I will be the distraction,” she rolled her eyes, “You aren’t exactly conspicuous.”

“I can blend,” he argued.

“No, you can’t,” most everyone else chimed in. Sharon laughed at his frown that followed and nudged his shoulder. 

“We’re here. If everyone could actually act like heroes, that would be swell,” Phil interrupted all of them. 

“Good luck, Stevie,” Jamie spoke quietly through the coms before the mission began.

Steve followed the plan to a T. Everything appeared to be going swimmingly. They successfully infiltrated the building and they had men tied up on each floor. Natasha and Sharon were going over files with Phil. Tony hadn’t even bothered to come in the building as he was too busy amusing himself on the roof. It was only when they heard a shot over their coms that it became clear things had gone a bit too swimmingly for a reason.

“We need backup!” Ward was yelling. Steve could hear Jamie shouting in Russian and shots rang out.

“Fuck,” Steve growled and took off without a second thought. The team followed quickly, though Sharon shouted after him to think things through.

“There’s god damn HYDRA agents on the roof with our sniper team,” Tony informed as he took off to join them.

“Jamie!” Steve called out, hoping she could reply on the headset, but he heard nothing. When he looked up to the roof they were camped and saw more bodies than there should have been. One went flying for the roof and hurtled towards the ground, but then they heard a helicopter heading in.

“Shit,” Sharon barked, “Everyone get to the roof, now!” Steve immediately mobilized. He bolted into the building and sprinted up the stairs. When he finally got to the scene he was greeted by Tony fighting off 3 agents while Ward was grappling with another. The various SHIELD agents were all disposed or dead. Jamie was being overpowered by at least 6 men. The helicopter was already landing and Steve realized what was happening - they were there for Jamie. Sharon and Natasha were right behind him when an explosion shook the foundation.

“We need to get everyone and roll out, this place is going to collapse,” Natasha warned. Tony had knocked several men back just as Steve launched a few more off the ledge. Sharon shot a few when Jamie screamed. Someone was muttering something in Russian and even Natasha froze. Men were dragging her onto the helicopter and it began to take off before they even secured her in the vessel.

“Don’t you fuckin dare!” Tony roared and moved for the Helicopter. Steve had leaped forward and grabbed onto the landing bars of the chopper and pulled himself up. He got his bearings and started fighting the men trying to further subdue Jamie. Tony had the pilot occupied and they began to spin in the air. They nearly hurtled towards the river.

“Steve,” Jamie gasped as she found herself being pulled by one of the HYDRA agents as he fell out the open door. Steve lunged and wrapped his hand around her arm.

“Tony! Get us level!” Steve ordered as he desperately tried to keep ahold of Jamie in his grasp. Her eyes were wide with fear. Everything flashed back for both of them - a train car hurtling down the tracks with snow and ice all around them. He tried so hard to keep ahold of her. 

“Fuck, no,” Steve half-sobbed as he grunted in frustration. Jamie had tears in her eyes as the weight of the other man kept pulling her down, but she finally shook him off in time for Steve to make a move. Steve mustered all he had and roughly jerked her upwards, he was sure he dislocated her shoulder in the process. She screamed and launched herself at him and gripped the front of his gear so tight. He pulled her close and kept her body close to his as he realized they were about to crash into the water despite all Tony had been trying to do to avoid it. Steve tucked them both and they crashed into the water with a deafening boom. Just before they hit he heard panicked voices through the com. They were all drowned out by Jamie’s heavy breathing. When water was suddenly engulfing them he twisted to get them out of the wreckage and to the surface. She was struggling to swim as her arm was limp at her side. Steve dragged her upwards until they both took deep breaths. Tony had already surfaced and airlifted them in seconds. He could see Sharon looking on in horror as Natasha shouldered Clint. He was seconds from passing out, but hung on to keep Jamie secured. Before he knew it they were back at the tower. He felt like he was in a daze; all sound was muffled and the world was narrowed to Jamie’s pained face. A medic from their medical unit was suddenly hovering on Jamie’s side and she flinched before wincing. Steve tried to reach out but just found himself blacking out.

 

There was nothing but the smell of disinfectant, the sound of beeping monitors, and the weight of something across his legs. He opened his eyes to find Jamie, arm bandaged and her hair in a messy knot, draped across his legs atop his hospital bed. Sharon was in a nearby chair, reading from some file, and Sam was drinking coffee on the other side. Sharon appeared to have a black eye and a wrapped wrist.

“What happened?” he managed before Jamie shot straight up and half-glared at him. 

“Well, you spent so much time keepin’ your girl alive that you failed to notice your lungs being punctured by your very broken ribs. You’re actually all healed now. You just know how they are here about making sure you don’t die,” Sam explained.

“Oh…” Steve hummed and looked back to Jamie.

“Stevie,” she breathed out, “You could have died.”

“And so could you. Neither of us are indestructible,” he countered.

“There was no perfect way to handle a HYDRA surprise,” Sharon cut in, “We were ambushed.”

“Because they want their Soldier back,” Ward added from where he stood in the doorway. He walked further into the room and Steve saw how very beat up the man managed to get during their mission. 

“They wanted Nat back when she left, it makes sense they’d come after her too,” Sam frowned.

“So...this is my life then?” Jamie huffed, “I leave the tower and have to always worry that HYDRA is around the corner?”

“We can keep you safe. They won’t always come after you,” Sharon soothed. She had stood up and placed her hands on both Steve’s arm and Jamie’s shoulder. Jamie vaulted backwards at the contact and ran from the room, knocking Ward as she went.

“Jamie!” Steve shouted and started getting up from the bed, he pulled out all his IVs and stumbled out the door despite the protests from Sharon. Jamie had apparently taken the stairs and Steve was right on her heels. He watched her whip around each bend and sore upwards to the floor Steve lived on. He barely caught her in time and she was slamming her fist into the wall of his living room. She was crying and threw her jacket across the room. She continued to storm to her bedroom and felt Steve stand behind her.

“They’ll never stop,” she whimpered as she sank to the floor.

“You know I won’t let them take you he pressed as he hovered before her. The IV lines were still hanging from his arms and he ripped them out the rest of the way and didn’t care about the blood dripping on his floor. 

“No one can stop them,” she hissed, “They’ll come for me every day until they get me back.”

“None of us will let them get within 5 feet of you. Not again,” Steve kneeled down to meet her eyes.

“It doesn’t matter. I belong to them,” she announced with an air of acceptance and sorrow.

“No,” Steve growled, “You don’t belong to them. You could never belong to them.”

“Of course I do. They made me,” she pushed.

“No. They cannot take what isn’t there’s. You belong to me,” he rushed out.

“What are you talking about?” she froze.

“Me. You have belonged to me since that day at the train station. You told me to wait for you and I didn’t quite follow through on that, but you are mine. I’ll let you go if you want, but they won’t be the ones to take you away,” he had been inching forward with every word and she just stayed until he was hovering over her. She swallowed and stared. His eyes were so dark, like clouds and rainstorms. Her lip trembled and Steve couldn’t stop staring. The fear was welling up in her again and she wanted nothing more than to sprint from the building and barricade herself in some abandoned building by the river. She closed her eyes and Steve slowly cupped her jaw. He took small steps closer as she craned her neck. He was taller now, towering over her. Last time they were eye-level. He liked this better. He gently pressed his lips to hers 


	5. Chapter 5

When their lips met Jamie felt her body almost immediately go lax, as if this was exactly what she needed. Steve's hand slowly moved from her jaw to her neck. They pulled apart reluctantly, her big eyes blinking up at him as she struggled to determine what it was she needed to say. 

"Stevie, I - "

Whatever she intended to say was cut off by JARVIS announcing that Agent Ward was there to debrief with her. Steve's hand curled possessively around the back of her neck before she stepped back.

"You didn't debrief before?" he cocked his head to the side.

"I didn't want to, not until you were awake anyway," she revealed and he gave a soft smile. They both walked to the door and Steve beckoned Ward in while his hand was firm on Jamie's lower back. Ward stood near the entrance of the kitchen and waited for both to give him any sort of indication that they were ready to start.

  


“While you waited for your pal to come to we collected all the intel and we should review the mission,” he started.

“It could’ve gone better,” Jamie rolled her eyes.

“Obviously,” Ward smirked, “But it turns out that HYDRA had a heads up on our location. We had good spots and we handled  the mission well up until the first guy landed on the roof.”

“Landed? He came from the sky?” Steve perplexed.

“Grappling hook to the ledge,” Jamie mumbled.

“Exactly. They were camped out at the building to the north and clearly had been planning on busting us. The main event was a distraction and plan to get you into the fray,” Ward explained.

“It wouldn’t be the first time they tried something like that to get at one of our people,” Steve added.

“Which is why we are worried,” Ward continued.

“Worried they’ll come after me again?” Jamie half-snorted, “They aren’t known for backing down.”

“Which is why, if we continue to use you in missions we will have to buffer you,” Ward sighed.

“I could just keep her with me,” Steve countered.

“Nick doesn’t want you distracted,” Ward shrugged one shoulder.

“Wait - “

“Then we can keep her with Natasha or Sharon or even Wade,” Steve pressed on, cutting Jamie off.

“That could work, but there are logistics to work out,” Ward hummed, “We could give her more armor.”

“Excuse me!” Jamie growled. Both men looked up at her and paused, “I. Am. Not. A fucking glass menagerie. Do not talk about me like I’m not in the room. Don’t make fucking decisions for me.” 

“Jamie, I’m just trying to keep you safe. I - “

“No. This is enough. You can’t keep me in a case, Steve!” she stormed out of the kitchen and slammed the door to her room.

“Huh,” Ward stared.

“You should go…” Steve kept looking at her door and felt guilt creeping in.

“She’ll get over it,” Ward reassured before finally leaving the apartment.  Steve just went back to her room and knocked on the door.

“Jamie?” he tested. He heard movement but she didn’t respond. She got like that before, even before the war. Whenever she was extremely mad she would lock herself away and got nonverbal before erupting like a tornado hours later and bringing some finality to the upset. He kept replaying what she said when she was mad to pinpoint the exact nature of how he fucked up.

“JARVIS? What’s a glass menagerie?” he sighed.

“It is a small trinket, sir. But, if I may, I think Miss Barnes was referring to the play by Tennessee Williams. I have already uploaded it to your Starkpad,” 

 

It was hours later when Jamie had calmed down. She might have taken an angry nap buried in every pillow in her bedroom. She was still a bit mad, but reasoning had come to her. Steve was just being Steve - protective and dumb. He was letting his thick-headed values cloud his practical brain. When she opened her door she found Steve asleep on the floor in the hall, like he had been waiting. 

“You’re such a meatball, Steve,” she sighed before nudging him awake. He looked up at her slowly and rose to his feet. She tugged him into her room where he fell into robotic movements and waited for her to give any indication of what she wanted. She simply kept blinking up at him with her large eyes and biting on her lower lip.

“I didn’t mean to dismiss you before - to get so...protective and territorial. HYDRA almost took you again, and that scared me. I realized that I would do anything to keep you around, even if it meant making you unhappy in the interim. I’m sorry,” he frowned. 

“It’s ok, Stevie. That’s just how you are,” she smiled, “You even kissed like I was gonna break. Even when you were smaller than me.” At that, Steve froze.

“You remember?” Steve tilted his head and reflected back, thinking about her smeared lipstick on his lips as he walked back to his apartment and remembered the way her hip felt under his hand.

“I thought it was a dream at first,” she shrugged.

“Not a dream,” Steve breathed out.

“You told Stark about it. Apparently. Pepper mentioned it,” she rolled her eyes.

“Worried I tainted your reputation?” Steve smirked.

“Hardly,” she teased back. 

“You know...I haven’t kissed anyone else,” Steve revealed after a beat.

“I don’t think I can say the same thing,” she furrowed her brow and tried not to think about  the phantom hands and lips she kissed as the soldier - all for missions and all detached.

“Doesn’t make me want you any less,” Steve confirmed. 

“I’m a goddamn mess, Steve,” she leveled.

“And if I remember correctly, I said you belong to me, regardless of any perceived flaws,” he stared. 

“Stevie,” she waivered. He stepped forward again and wrapped an arm around her middle, his arm heavy and warm as it pulled her forward roughly. He bent his head and kissed her again, lips insistent and firm. She gasped against him as she melted into the kiss. There was something more to this one. She has now kissed Steve 3 times and this one felt like a brand. She was moved backwards to the wall and the surface was cold against her shoulders. His hands danced down her sides and she could feel his fingers move beneath the shirt. His fingers were rough and calloused against her smooth skin. He tugged and the shirt slipped over her head. He somehow managed it with barely having their lips part. She wasn’t sure how and jealousy flared within her as she imagined him doing this with others - his hands roaming their gentler curves and them feeling him come undone. He said he hadn’t kissed anyone else, but the way he moved made her feel entirely inept and new.

“God, Jamie. Lookit you,” he managed as he stared at her flat stomach and dark eyes. There were scars, sure, but not more than he had. She was breathing fast and nearly trembling in his arms. He would think she was afraid if he didn’t know better. Her hands fisted in the front of his shirt and pulled him back. Her tongue pressed into his mouth and he moaned as he felt the heat of her mouth. He picked her up and dragged her up the wall, his hips pressed against hers. She whimpered as he moved and she tore his shirt apart. That urged him on he quickly divested her of the rest of her clothes - pulling off her bralet and nearly ripping those small shorts from her legs. Soon, she was nude in his arms and he was still clad in sweatpants. 

“I thought about this. I remember wanting to pin you to the tiny bed in my old apartment and love you all night long. I wanted you to pick me over those boys you took on dates. Wanted to take you dancing,” he murmured into her neck.

“Wanted you to. Just wanted you to make a move, Stevie. Thought I wasn’t good enough for you,” she groaned, “Wasn’t smart enough.”

“Shut the fuck up, Jamie,” he growled and tugged at her hair. He kept her aloft as he dropped to his knees. She watched him as licked his way from her navel to her mound, the hair soft and her lips slick. He nosed against the juncture of her thigh and hip before licking into her core. She shouted out as she felt his tongue push into her. This was something she never remembered. No one had used her body like this - for her own pleasure. 

“Jesus,” Steve moaned before sucking on her clit and thrusting a finger inside her tight passage. He had watched more porn than he thought was necessary and had managed to understand some of the basics about pleasure. He worked his finger in and out and waited her her to indicate it felt good. He hooked one knee over his shoulder and pressed even deeper. She spasmed above him and grabbed at his hair. His face was buried in her cunt and her slick dripping down his chin. He felt her flutter against his lips and she screamed, her orgasm cresting over her. He didn’t give her a moment before pulling her from the wall and lying her down on the floor. He crawled up between her legs and watched her struggle to catch her breath. 

“Where did you learn that?” she asked, panting, as she licked her lips.

“Uh - porn,” he laughed against her stomach and slowly kissed up her chest, taking the time to lick one breast and get his mouth on her nipple, tongue swirling around it. She whined and arched up into the touch.

“Steve, please,” she begged, not sure what she was begging for exactly. Just more.

“Jamie,” Steve whispered and kissed her once more as she pulled at the waistband of his sweats. His cocked bobbed out and rested against her leg. 

“I want you. Please,” she begged once more as she wrapped her leg around his hip, urging him closer. He pressed his finger to her core again to gather up her wetness and spreading it onto his cock. He let his cockhead drag up and down her slit and catch at her opening. She wiggled her hips below him, wanting him to finally get inside her, barely registering that this would be Steve’s first time. Ever. And it was with  _ her. _

“God, Jamie,” Steve hissed as he pressed inside and felt her tight heat wrap around him. She clawed at his back and shoulders as he slowly thrust in and out, developing a rhythm. They kissed again as he moved quicker and harder, more breathing into each other’s mouths as they moved. She rose to meet each thrust held onto him so tightly. 

  


They moved fluidly, sure she was getting rug burn on her back and him on his knees. They didn’t care. This moment felt like decades coming. Every step led them to this moment, which they both needed. 

“I - oh!” Jamie screamed as he hit that spot inside over and over again. She tightened around him as her lips parted into a soft ‘o.’ Steve watched in adoration as she fell apart the second time because of him and he couldn't hold back anymore. He sputtered and thrust a little harder before cumming and emptying deep inside her. She moved her face and they kissed again, her lips soft and pliant, slowly smiling as she felt the heat of him spilled inside. He brushed her hair back from her face and pressed his forehead to his.

“In case it wasn’t clear...I love you,” Steve announced with a grin.

“I love you too, Steve,” she smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck. 


	6. Chapter 6

Jamie woke up slowly in bed, a shallow ache at her core and a warm band across her waist. She felt a warm body at her back and a warm breath at the back of her neck. She stiffened for a moment before remembering the night before. Remembering Steve and how he took her on the floor like she belonged to him. He was the only person she could ever belong to. She rolled over slowly to see Steve’s sleeping face, his brow relaxed. She traced down his nose, the bump from his numerous breaks never having been fixed by the serum. She liked it better that way. His eyes slowly fluttered open and he locked eyes with her, a smile slowly creeping across his face.

“Morning, beautiful,” he breathed out.

“Hi,” she replied with a blush, remembering she was still naked in his arms. 

“Gotta say, this might be my favorite way to wake up,” he said as he pulled her flush to his chest. She rolled her eyes playfully and let her body relax to his.

“So, can I assume you aren’t mad at me anymore?” Steve murmured against her temple.

“Never was all that mad. And I suppose I can forgive you,” she feigned annoyance.

“Well, can’t let my girl stay mad at me,” Steve chuckled.

“Your girl?” she arched a brow.

“Am I being presumptuous? Do I need to wine and dine you first? Take out my competition?” she snickered and kissed her forehead down to her nose.

“Pretty sure I’m the only one with any competition,” she mumbled.

“What?” Steve paused.

“Agent Carter. Can’t believe there’s another one to worry about,” she sighed.

“Sharon? No. Sharon does not want me. Even if she did, I don’t want her. Just you. Only ever you,” he pressed.

“I remember the way Peggy watched you. And you watched her. I was so sure you got wrapped up in her while I was in Germany,” she confessed.

“I mean, I thought about it. She looked at me like I was special and important. Even before,” he stroked her cheekbone, “But it wasn’t...there was something missing. She could never be you, no matter how much sass she had.”

“I think she had more sass, Steve,” she snuggled closer.

“Yea, well, I like your sass,” he said right as his stomach gave a deep growl.

“Hungry, Stevie?” Jamie laughed.

“A bit. Someone made me burn a lot of calories last night,” he rolled them so she was underneath him and he was bracketed by her legs. 

“I could argue that you did all the work there,” she quirked up one corner of her mouth.

“Maybe, he beamed before leaning down to kiss her. They slowly left the bed and she followed him, stark naked to his bedroom. He watched as she pulled on one of his henleys that barely reached the bottom of her ass. She stretched and he caught views of her pussy as she walked away, glancing over her shoulder. He quickly pulled on boxer briefs before trailing after her. She started brewing some coffee and he considered their breakfast options. He remembered trying to make her pancakes once and burned over half of them. Now, JARVIS could easily prevent such a disaster. He started mixing up the batter as he watched her slowly sip coffee on the other side of the kitchen. The light cascaded down her side and her shoulders looked relaxed. Her whole body thrummed and vibrated with deep contentment and his mirrored hers. He thought about her really being his. He could wake up to this every day. Kiss her every night. Love her deeply, gently, ferociously. By the time the pancakes were finished, he had pictured their entire lives folding out before him.

She filled a bowl with fruit and moved around him as he portioned out the pancakes and she got him a large cup of coffee. They sat side by side at the breakfast nook, Steve reading the news on his Starkpad and Jamie more focused on a book she borrowed from Bruce, she was at a part about a cat and a well when JARVIS announced a request from Tony. He wanted the others to join him and Nick for a briefing.

“Will I be expected to be suited up or is this more informal?” Steve asked.

“Sir is still in his pajamas and Pepper has him hoisted up on his shoulders. Casual would be best,” the AI responded. Jamie darted off and only slipped on a bra under Steve’s henley and a pair of shorts. Steve dawned some jeans and a blue t-shirt. 

“Is this about the mission from the other day?” Jamie asked as she stood in front of Steve, his hand resting gently on her hip.

“Probably not. More likely that Tony has some half-cocked scheme that Nick will shoot down and we can all go back to bed,” he breathed out and placed a kiss to the top of her head.

“Are you going to kiss me in front of your team?” she turned.

“Only if you’re ok with it. Our team won’t mind. I suppose you’ve never seen Natasha get handsy with Bruce,” he rolled his eyes playfully. She thought about it for a minute and pictured Steve fawning over her with the team around them. He likely wouldn’t baby her, and his touch always felt nice. 

“Just don’t get too big for your britches in front of everyone, Stevie,” she giggled.

“I’ve never,” he mocked offense.

When they arrived at the communal floor they found Bruce drinking tea with Natasha half sprawled in his lap. Clint was perched near Peter who was half listening to him and half teasing Wade. Tony was, as JARVIS had said, slumped over Pepper. Thor was in attendance as well, Jane speaking with her intern Darcy and there was another woman with long, dark hair to their right. She looked a bit bored and mildly annoyed. Ward was there as well, standing next to Phil who appeared to have had too much coffee as his eyes bugged out at the file in his hands. Sam looked markedly unimpressed where he was stationed by the window.

“Good, you’re here,” Nick announced, seemingly from the shadows.

“I come when called, sir,” Steve gave nod and directed Jamie to the nearest sofa. He sat down and pulled her up against his body. She melted into his side. 

“So, it has come to my attention that HYDRA has placed an order of extermination of the Winter Soldier should she not be successfully captured. Which is...unusual,” Nick observed. Which it was. Even when Natasha left there was no hit. Sure, they wanted her apprehended, but they knew it was futile. They had trained her, after all. Wanting Jamie dead if not captured was something different.

“I don’t understand,” Natasha furrowed her brow, “They lost many assets in the past. A lot were killed, but there was hardly an official order. Sometimes losses were accepted, especially when it became clear many couldn’t function without orders. 

“I’ll die before she does if I have any say in the matter,” Steve growled. 

“Calm down, Cujo,” Tony yawned, “They aren’t getting within 20 feet of her.”

“You mean ‘they aren’t getting within 20 feet of her’ again?” Darcy interjected.

“I’m well-trained. I can handle myself well enough. Plus, I’m rarely alone with this one,” Jamie tossled Steve’s hair and let him calm down some. Steve just smiled at her before hooking his arm around her middle and pulling her in tighter.

“Are you wearing Spangle’s shirt?” Tony paused.

“You're wearing mine, so I hardly think it matters if she’s wearing his,” Pepper rolled his eyes playfully.

“Oh my god. You two finally fucked,” Tony cackled.

“Tony!” Pepper hissed.

“Only took you 70 damn years,” Tony continued.

“Tony. Stop,” Bruce chirped.

“What? This is important. Our little Stevie finally lost his v-card and it was to his long lost love slash accidentally enemy. You can’t write a better love story than that,” Tony argued. Pepper looked mortified on Jamie’s behalf.

“Can we please stop talking about this?” Jamie shot him a glare and Steve looked about as pink as he could get.

“I do believe we were more focused on the evil organization that wants his girl dead. Maybe focus up a bit, Stark,” Sam sighed, completely annoyed.

“We are initiating Foster Protocol,” Nick announced.

“Foster Protocol?” Jane stared.

“When the world had a sudden awareness of Thor as well as his very vulnerable scientist girlfriend, we placed protective detail and tweaked JARVIS to be linked up to you at all times when you were not in the tower. Clearly, you never noticed and are very much alive,” Nick went on.

“Except for that time she got transported to another planet, but I guess that’s neither here nor there,” Darcy snorted.

“My lady Jane will always be safe,” Thor beamed.

“If I hardly leave the tower then that protocol won’t be entirely necessary,” Jamie worried her lower lip.

“Or, and here is my argument, we find every last HYDRA compound and burn them to the ground,” Steve cut in.

“Why am I not surprised by that being your plan?” Natasha glanced his way. 

“How about we finish gathering our intel and I let you loose to wreak all the havoc you want?” Nick looked entirely put upon as he crossed his arms over his chest.

“Sounds fine to me,” Jamie nudged Steve. 

“Until then, any time you leave the tower you will have a detail. You won’t really notice them so it should be easy to go about your day,” Nick shrugged. Natasha, Clint, and Jamie all laughed at that.

“Yea, the trained HYDRA spies won’t notice other spies. Sure,” Clint laughed.

“I will certainly notice people following me,” Jamie hummed but didn’t seem to care much. She didn’t plan to leave the tower much, if at all.

“I’m not going on anymore missions until she’s safe,” Steve mentioned.

“Steve, that’s ridiculous,” Jamie stared.

“Because Steve has never made a ridiculous decision,” the women seated over near Thor finally spoke up.

“Wait, why can’t Loki keep her safe?” Steve shot back.

“Don’t volunteer me to babysit your girlfriend,” the woman, Loki, replied.

“Not babysit,” he waved his hands in front of his face, “Magically cloak or whatever. I saw you do it with Val and Thor more than once. You did it the other day when Darcy started the fire in the lab.”

“Hey. I didn’t start the fire,” Darcy countered. Loki leaned forward as she balanced her elbows on her knees. She considered it for a few minutes and had decided she could and should do it. She just liked to make Steve work a bit harder for things.

“Brother will gladly do it. I know he worries about your shieldmaiden as he worries for his own,” Thor interrupted. 

“Brat? ( _ Brother? _ ),” Jamie glanced to Natasha.

“Ne bespokoytes' ob etom. My mozhem pogovorit' ob etom pozzhe. ( _ Don’t worry about it. We can talk about it late _ r),” Natasha answered. Loki rolled her eyes and snapped her fingers.

“It’s done,” Loki sighed. Val beamed and crawled into her lap.

“Thank you,” Steve gave a soft smile.

“What’s done?” Jamie looked down at herself.

“Magic shield. No matter where  you go, we can find you. Nothing can touch you. Don’t think about it too much,” Loki shrugged.

“That, oddly, doesn’t make me feel that much better, but thanks…” she kept looking at her arms and legs as if she could see the magic all around her body, “You won’t know everything I’m doing, will you?”

“I won’t be able to see you in my mind or know when you’re fucking if that’s what you really worried about,” Loki surmised. 

“Believe it or not, I’m more worried about you knowing what I’m thinking about. I’m used to not having privacy. When I was with HYDRA they used to just strip me and hose me down to ‘clean’ me before putting me back under ice,” she recalled with a faraway look in her eyes. Natasha seemed to remember the same thing. Steve pulled her tighter to his side and kissed the top of her head.

“Well, some of that is sorted out then…” Phil trailed off, “The rest comes down to simple research and locating all HYDRA assets we can and taking out compounds as they appear. 

“Ya know, I could help you out with that,” Wade chimed in, “I can just call HYDRA Bob.”

“HYDRA Bob?” Tony gaped.

“What? He’s very funny,” Wade replied, “His wife makes great tuna noodle casserole.”

“I need a drink,” Tony groaned.

“You say that everyday,” Sam observed. 

“I have some work to do,” Wade stood abruptly as he started texting on his phone. Peter simply followed and Sam continued to look aggravated.

“You’re certainly more accomodating about having a protective detail,” Steve looked to Jamie.

“Maybe my focus shifted a little,” she smirked.

“Because you guys banged?” Tony jumped in, Pepper slapped his arm.

“Because I wouldn’t need to be distracting myself. And I don’t really need or want to go on missions. I like training. And I have far too much reading to catch up on,” she smiled.

“That will make things much easier,” Phil clapped his hands together. 

“I’d like to go back to what I was doing before we were all called down here. Especially since we have resolved it very easily,” Loki stood and pulled Val to her side.

“What were you doing that so important?” Tony rolled his eyes. Val just looked over to Loki with a blank expression as she started recalling what exactly was interupted. 

“Val. Obviously,” she blinked and both of them disappeared in a blink.

“I need to find a new place to live,” Sam grumbled and waved at Steve as he exited the common area.

“Meeting disbanded. Very professional. All of you,” Phil sighed in aggravation and Nick stared up at the ceiling and left the room.

“Jamie. Join me for some tea,” Natasha said, as if she was asking a question. Jamie gave Steve a smile before letting Natasha drag her away. She hooked her arm in Jamie’s and they made their way up to Natasha’s floor. They didn’t say anything as Natasha brewed some of the tea Bruce had gotten for Jamie recently. It was a blend of valerian, spearmint, and vanilla. It had become a go-to for Jamie and Natasha alike, especially when nights were too hard. They sat in companionable silence as they drank tea and sat by the window. The sun was masked by some clouds as the winter slowly approached. The days were getting colder. Natasha remembered Steve’s first winter after waking up. It was tense, to say the least. She suspected Jamie might have similar issues, but she would have Steve.

“So...who kissed who first?” the red head grinned.

“Steve,” Jamie bit her lip and brought her tea back to her mouth.

“He would. Let me guess. He finally made a move because Ward hit on you?” she asked.

“Ward did not hit on me,” Jamie rolled her eyes, not that she wasn’t acutely aware of the way the agent looked at her ass, “He’s sort of a possessive shit and kissed me when I was raving about HYDRA owning me.”

“You do not belong to HYDRA,” Natasha pressed.

“I know that I don’t. Not really. But it’s hard to shake the feeling that they’re always here. In my head,” she frowned.

“I had that too. I still have it sometimes. I spent a lot of time talking it through with Bruce actually. He sort of gets it. With the Hulk and everything. Whenever Bruce can’t handle it - when it’s too much and the Hulk has more power than he does, he anchors himself. I help with that. And he anchors me. I think Steve has always been your anchor. And you’re his,” she reached her hand out to gently lay her palm on Jamie’s, “We got away. They can’t control us anymore.”

“I know. I know that logically,” Jamie hummed.

“It takes time,” Natasha tilted her head and watched Jamie’s body relax more, “Was he at least good in bed? Steve seems like he would put in all the effort you would need.”

“Not that I have anything to compare him to, but he was amazing,” Jamie mumbled into her tea.

“I bet he wouldn’t be satisfied until you got off at least twice more than him,” she smirked.

“That he did,” Jamie recalled and felt her body shiver.

“Bruce is the same way. Very devoted,” she licked her lower lip, “He really likes to make sure every inch of my body if relaxed and pleased.”

“Lucky you,” Jamie gave, feeling her cheeks warm. She struggled to imagine Bruce being as domineering as she suspected Natasha needed, But even Steve wasn’t as straight-laced as she was sure the team thought he was.

“I’m happy, you know. That Steve and you finally found each other again. That you can be with each other. If only you two had tried earlier,” Natasha offered.

“I don’t think his heart could’ve handled what we did last night back in the 30s. Not that I like him better like this. I just like that he’s sturdier,” she snickered. 

“Don’t we all,” the red head deadpanned. 


End file.
